by Malbert » Tue Feb 05, 2013 10:41 am
A man walks into a bar with a monkey and orders a beer. After a minute, the monkey takes an olive and eats it. A few seconds after that, he takes a peanut and eats it. Then he wanders off to the billiards area, hops on a pool table, takes the cue ball and eats it, swallowing it whole. The bartender says, "Hey, buddy....your monkey just ate the cue ball!" and the guys says, "I'm so sorry.....I'll pay you for it..here's $20." and he leaves with the monkey. Two weeks later, they come back to the same bar. This time while the guys drinks a beer, the monkey takes an olive, sticks it in his butt, pulls it out and eats it. Then he takes a peanut, sticks it in his butt, pulls it out and eats it. The bartender asks the guy, "What's with the monkey? Why is he doing that?!" and the guys says, "It took him three days to shit out the cue ball he ate two weeks ago. Now he measures everything before he eats it."
The boobs are real; the smile is fake.