Life Thoughts by Ducky

[Fish Hook Girl]

LIFE THOUGHTS BY DUCKY

Marriage changes passion.
Suddenly you're in bed with a relative.

I saw a woman wearing a sweat shirt with 'Guess' on it.
So I said 'Implants?' She hit me.

How come we choose from just two people to run for president and over
fifty for MissAmerica ?

Now that food has replaced sex in my life, I can't even get into my
own pants.

I signed up for an exercise class and was told to wear loose fitting
clothing. If I HAD any loose fitting clothing, I wouldn't have signed up
in the first place!

When I was young we used to go 'skinny dipping,' now I just 'chunky
dunk.'

Don't argue with an idiot; people watching may not be able to tell the
difference.

Wouldn't it be nice if whenever we messed up our life we could simply
press 'Ctrl Alt Delete' and start all over? AMEN, AMEN !!

Why is it that our children can't read a Bible in school, but they can
in prison?

Wouldn't you know it....Brain cells come and brain cells go, but FAT cells live forever.

Why do I have to swear on the Bible in court when the Ten Commandments
cannot be displayed outside?

And remember: life is like a roll of toilet paper. The closer it gets to the end, the faster it goes.
Ya just might want to pass this along....

[Edit: I did not author this thing. But if you like it, I'll take credit for it.]

[moondance]

How come we choose from just two people to run for president and over fifty for MissAmerica ?

Good question! No answer at all is there.

[Seven Seas]

xxxxxxxxxx

[moondance]

Thank you so much for posting this. This is hilarious just as much as it is philosophical, if you really read some of those statements...

In turn, I feel as though recently I've been a MAJOR ducky (duckette) to someone I've been pining for a long time but, realization brought my meaningless, unrequited crush to a halt. Thank goodness for this b/c I learned a valuable lesson from it.

Off now to finding another piece of bread (a man) to be a duckette to. ROTFLMAO.

Here we go again. Fasten your seat belts.

[insanejane]

Very funny, FHG! Thanks!

[tonywojo]

Here we go again. Fasten your seat belts.

Clunk click every trip!

[Mr. Brian]

How come we choose from just two people to run for president and over
fifty for MissAmerica ?

Good question! No answer at all is there.

While flawed certainly we don't just choose between two people. Each party has primaries that shave that bunch down to one each. The Republicans began with 11 candidates and the Democrats began with 8. That's 18 right there. Then there are the various minor parties that barely get mentioned.

As of April 1, 179 individuals had filed a Statement of Candidacy and/ or Statement of Organization for the 2008 Presidential Election.

[JackT]

While flawed certainly we don't just choose between two people. Each party has primaries that shave that bunch down to one each. The Republicans began with 11 candidates and the Democrats began with 8. That's 18 right there. Then there are the various minor parties that barely get mentioned.

Can you tell us how a bill becomes a law?

[Mr. Brian]

Can you tell us how a bill becomes a law?

It's too complicated for someone like you to understand so here is a cartoon for you.

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